For the last several months, as Caroline has gazed lovingly at Kathleen and said, “Ma ma! Ma ma!” or clutched her bottle and said, “Ba ba,” I’ve tried to get her to say “Da da” with absolutely no luck.
So yesterday I’m sitting with her in my lap, and she suddenly slams her head back into the right side of my face, smack into the side of my nose. I literally saw stars. My hands went limp and Caroline started to tumble off my lap before Kathleen caught her.
Immediately that side of my face began to swell up. “I think she broke your nose,” Kathleen opined. I sat there, my face throbbing, glared at Caroline who was in Kath’s lap.
And Caroline smiles at me and chirps happily, “Da da!”
I suppose it’s marginally better than being hit in the head with a skillet while she says “Not the mama!”, but only marginally.
PAD
• 
🙂
Remember the bright side: We’re not watching her learn golf and smacking you in the nuts ala America’s Funniest Videos (AKA Stupid People Tricks).
Somehow I just bet you were expecting someone to bring that up.
Salutations,
Mitch
I’d keep her away from skillets, just to be on the safe side 😉
Well, at least Caroline apparently didn’t sustain any pain that would have further stifled her speaking to you 🙂
BTW, I saw on the news an hour ago that the original Captain Kangaroo, Bob Keeshan, died today. It’s a shame that my kids (and your Caroline) won’t have the chance to enjoy growing up watching such an influential, and entertaining, educator as he, as I did.
Well yeah, skillet swinging could encourage a Golden Corral addiction, too. Keep that gal outta the kitchen.
As one of two people who guessed the day she’d be born, I’m proud to know that her sense of timing is as good as mine. Sorry for the pain, PAD-DAD.
Todd Morton
Anyone remember that episode of the Simpsons where Maggie hit Homer in the head with a hammer?
“I told you why I can’t come to work! My baby beat me up! No, it’s not the worst excuse I’ve ever come up with!”
The only predictable thing about kids is that they’re unpredictable…
(glances side to side)
Errr… Does this mean we don’t get a weekly roundup?
(Ducks, slinks off)
Been there, done that.
My 18 month old son broke my nose twice in six weeks…
Oh boy, do I feel your pain! My 1 year old bonks both my husband and I in the head on a regular basis.
Hey, at least you got “Dada.” My son has said both Mama and Dada on a regular basis, but not to either of us in particular.
Ah, the joy and glamour of parenthood, eh?
Sheesh, I was right when I called her a Baby Jock at Philcon.
Already she’s beating her father up.
Wait ’til she hits nursery school. She’ll roll the principal once a day.
To Mitch (the other one)
So which one of us is ‘the other white meat?’
😉
Salutations,
EvilTwin
Man, I miss that show…
Good luck with the nose, though.
Sign this girl up for pee-wee hockey *now*.
My wife just gave birth to our baby girl this past Saturday. Your story scares me PAD! Sure hope I don’t have to worry about broken bones, frying pans, and talking dinos just to get my girl to say “Da da”?
At least she said something new and interesting. My 18 month old son broke my wife’s nose with a book and then hit her again, before I could grab the book from him. (He seems to like hitting mommy with books but we don’t know why.)
Ouch. My condolences to your nose — but there are likely times later in your life when Caroline’ll say something and you’d prefer the broken nose. 🙂
(He seems to like hitting mommy with books but we don’t know why.)
If they’re political books (from either side), maybe she’s forming opinions early?
TWL
Well, my niece isn’t talking yet (She will be soon), But she has learned how to bite. So now, she’ll wank up to family members, and if they’re not careful, CHOMP!.
Well look on the bright side, at least she said it. I’ve had that happen to me with little ones sitting on my lap, it does hurt like a mother. 😉
Heh. My dad tells me I used to have unnering aim, and displayed it on a regular basis. Unfortunately for him, it was targeted quite a bit lower than his nose.
It’s not just human children. My border collie puppy beats/paws me in the head all the time. I had to replace my glasses last month. (Maybe I shouldn’t admit publicly to being abused by a puppy…)
Cool obscure TV reference though. PAD I salute you.
Keep that thought in mind, because by the time she walks, she’ll be ready for the WWE. 🙂
James-
Congradulations on the birth of your daughter. Treasure this time, they grow up fast.
Bill-
Too late. She has been walking for over 3 months and loves being “free range” baby. She, of course, gets into everything she shouldn’t. Her new trick is going up and down stairs.
Peter, while I feel your pain, it could be worse…a lot worse. I’m laying flat on my back with my nine month old daughter on top of me laying down on her back, i.e. her back to my stomach/chest. She yawns and stretches, raising her feet upward. Then she suddenly shivers and brings her feet quickly down together onto the body part of mine most responsible for her creation. We’re talking swelling, drainage with needles and wearing nothing but baggy sweatpants for two weeks. Fortunately there was no lasting damage and she now has a younger brother (who is a carbon copy of me at that age, so there’s no doubt as to my functionality), but I still can’t watch America’s Funniest Home Videos to this day.
I’m proud to catch the Dinosaurs reference.
I’m somewhat sympathetic to the physical pain that kids can cause.
CJA
You should bring her to the Mr. Lizard show.
“Caroline, you set off the nuclear bomb while I stand behind this lead shield!”
“We’re gonna need another Carry!”
🙂
-Steve
When my son was 5 months old I had him sitting on my lap, facing away from me. He threw his head back directly into my nose. While my eyes were watering with the pain I see a blood smear on the back of his head. I immediately go into panic mode, thinking I’ve broken the baby.
Luckily, the baby was fine. My nose was broken and the blood was mine.
Ah, the joys of parenthood.
What is life but a delicate balance of pain and pleasure.
Yes, just when you want to get REALLY ANGRY, they go and get all CUTE on you! 🙂
Peter, just last night I was laying down with my grandchildren – Cullen 4 and Rowan 2 – Rowan casually lifted her head from the pillow we were both sharing and bonked me on the edge of cheekbone. I think I blacked out for a second. Not only do I have a big bruise this morning but my glasses seem to be irrepairably bent. I thought being a grandmother would be easier!!!*
So Peter, is your nose broken, or what? You said Kathleen opined it was, but you didn’t say if it was. If so, hope it heals up soon.
I guess sometimes we forget how strong kids can be. When my sister and brother-in-law came over once during the holidays with my beautiful one-and-a-half-year old nephew, my mom was holding him, and he kept smacking her in the face.
A week or so ago, he came over, and finally managed to say my name (It came out “Chi-chi”), and his new favorite word, “NO!” Maybe his next words should be “No hitting below the belt.”
Peter’s nose is fine (not even bent out of shape ). Caroline is raising the bar on cuteness to new levels. She is learning that there are books that are hers and books that are not hers that she may not play with. A good thing in this house to be sure.
I have been headbutted, balled, punched, puked, pìššëd, vomited and shat on by my little monster.
He is the best thing that ever happend to me.
Ever have a wee little one rip out a piercing?
That stuff stings…
I’ve been lurking on this site for some time now…and I didn’t realize how many of us had infants and preschoolers. I don’t have any real reason to be surprised, I guess, but still…
Anyway, my year-old twins beat the crap out of us all the time. Jonathan Clark is a biter, while Abigail Lauren arches her back and stiffens her body, launching herself backwards as a human missle right at our cheekbones.
It’s a wonder one of us hasn’t been to the emergency room yet.
Ooooo, wait, we’ve all missed the best possible Trek joke on this. Remember how women are described in “Spock’s Brain”:
“the givers of pain and delight!“
Is it possible Cath was speaking Chinese? Because in Cantonese, “da da” means “hit! hit!” 😉
My grandmother has so far received two black eyes from each of my children so far. Both when they were of the 3 month age. We won’t even go to what they do to my poor husband or my three year-olds attempt to “help” the cat.
WHy all these things happen?
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