Hey, Chuck Lorre…

I remember reading that Kunal Nayyar, who plays “Raj” on “The Big Bang Theory,” was getting short shrift in the salary department while everyone else in the cast was getting serious bumps.

I can’t help but observe that since Charlie Sheen had just been fired, you should have some additional money lying around. So how about giving some more salary love to the cast of the smartest half hour of comedy on television.

Even if Raj is wrong headed about Aquaman.

PAD

59 comments on “Hey, Chuck Lorre…

  1. Of course, in a Marvel/DC crossover, Aquaman would never be able to beat Tiger Shark.
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    And you know why, right?
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    It’s because Tiger Shark has tiger blood in him!
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    You are so winning, Peter!
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    Or as I like to call you, Tzur.
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    🙂

    1. Oh, tiger blood not Tigra blood. And here I thought he’d been revealing interesting things about his parentage.

    1. You know what? That’s a series.
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      Two guys, one of whom lives just like Charlie Sheen does–call him Carlos–and another guy who conducts himself like Chuck Lorre does. Call his character “Chris.” They can be brothers, they can be co-workers who have never liked each other, they can be whatever.
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      And Chris dies, and the last thing he sees is Carlos, oblivious to the fact that he’s dying, laughing with some floozies on his arms as he’s walking away.
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      And Chris is so pìššëd that he comes back and hangs around haunting Carlos.
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      Call it “Chris Crossed.”
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      PAD

      1. That’s remarkably close to the premise of the original Smothers Brothers TV series, a mid-60s sitcom in which nice brother Tommy is an angel who comes back in ghost form to watch over ne’er-do-well brother Dickie.

      2. Jeez, I’d forgotten about that series. I have only the vaguest recollections. If anything, my notion is more like the original concept of “Red Dwarf” with Lister being harassed by a holo of the bunkmate he couldn’t stand.
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        PAD

      3. Luigi, If Peter was a FOX exec, he would put the show on Friday nights where it would last exactly seven weeks before getting pulled.

      4. “Luigi, If Peter was a FOX exec, he would put the show on Friday nights where it would last exactly seven weeks before getting pulled.”
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        Unless, of course, it developed a fanbase.
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        In which case, it would last 4 weeks before being moved to Wed nights. Where it would be for 2 weeks before being moved to Tue nights, except on weeks where it was pre-empted for something during which it would run on either Wed or Thur nights.
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        Then, it would be cancelled because of low ratings.
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        Theno

  2. That one was only 3 weeks ago, and seemingly precipitated Sheen’s counterattack on Lorre.

    1. I said six weeks ago because I counted backwards from the most recent of the vanity cards on the site. It ran near the end of my recovery from gall bladder surgery and things were kinds blurred together then.

      kim

  3. I’m all in favor of “Raj” receiving more compensation for his part in BBT, but it’s hard to feel like this is the last word on Sheen and “Two and a Half Men”. CBS is just going to drop this cash cow?

    Does any of this remind anyone else of Howard Beale and “Network”? In that film, the networks kept putting a mentally deranged man on to deliver the news, because of ratings.

    Imagine “Two and a Half Men” where Charlie just ad libbed his own dialogue…

    1. CBS has yet to slam the door on renewing the series. The question is (a) do they recast or (b) write Sheen’s character out.
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      To me the bottom line is: It’s such a stupid show, it’s possible the viewers will accept anything that happens on it without blinking. For that matter, what if they got someone completely unexpected? What if they got John Lithgow as a long lost uncle or cousin? Hëll, *I* would start watching it.
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      PAD

      1. Better yet– mock Sheen’s rampage and it turns out he has Gallifreyian blood in him. Charlie (the character) gets into horrible car wreck and regenerates into John Lithgow.

      2. Peter, this is creepy. I was thining the same thing earlier, and plotted the whole thing out to Clara. Episode starts with Charlie in a nasty car wreck, he’s in a full body cast with bandages over his face, can barely talk… Slowly over a period of weeks, they peel off bandages to reveal a new lead, be it Emilio, Matt Broderick, Tim Guinee, Danny Strong, Seth Green… hëll, let Martin play him a season. Anybody except Charlie’s drugged-up ášš. Danny Trejo. Somebody who’s a real badass, not some delusional ŧwáŧ.
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        There’s precedent for it on soaps. And that’s exactly what my wife’s reaction was; “You’ve been watching too many soaps.”
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        What can I say, you grow up with a mother who’s hooked on “Days Of Our Lives”, see what happens…

      3. To me the bottom line is: It’s such a stupid show, it’s possible the viewers will accept anything that happens on it without blinking.

        Thing is, for me, it’s one of the favorite TV shows for my mother (who turns 95 tomorrow, the 9th). And few things have been more uncomfortable for me than watching 2&1/2M with her. But she is getting sick of Sheen’s antics, too.

  4. Mark Rothman, over at his blog, had an idea for a replacement for Sheen that could actually work really well: Jason Bateman. He’s in the ballpark for looking like Sheen, and he could deliver the lines just as well.

    It’s a thought, anyway.

  5. Actually, we don’t even need to get a guy who LOOKS like Charlie Sheen. The two Darrens on Bewitched proved that.

    Rob Lowe has done good comedic work on Parks and Recreation, and in his small appearances on Californication.
    And we know he can act, thanks to 4 years playing Sam Seabourne.

    I’d like to see Rob Lowe take a shot at it.

    1. As much as I would watch if Lowe was in it, I would be not holding my breath for the announcement that he is leaving the series. He seems to get all hyped about being ON something but once there, he gets disgruntled and wants out.

      It happened in West Wing and Brothers and Sisters.

      Kath the Wife

      1. Rob’s like David Kelley in that respect, Kath. David will crank up a wonderful series, be showrunner for a few seasons, get bored, kick himself upstairs while someone else runs it, and then quit. Chicago Hope. Boston Legal. I see it allatime.

  6. Unfortunately, while I applaud the thought behind this, according to what I’ve read, Sheen has a “pay or play” clause in his contract, which means even though he was fired, he’s still getting paid for the rest of this season, and all of next.

    Ridiculous, but true…

      1. No, he’s just happy to see you.
        .
        You know, if they do decide to keep the show running (which might be necessary in order to make the money to pay off Sheen’s contract), recasting would be pretty simple. Charlie dies of a sudden heart attack brought on by his years of drinking, partying, and poor diet. (Cue line from housekeeper about being amazed he even had a heart.) In his will, he leaves the house to Alan, with snarky bit about how Alan can’t take care of himself without his big brother to help. Later (maybe in an ep or two), Alan finds himself struggling to keep up with bills, housekeeper’s salary, and gas to pick up/drop off his son, and has to take on a wacky roommate to cover the shortfall. Voila, we’re once again back to Two and a Half Men.
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        If there’s a betting pool on how this whole mess washes out, there’s my bet.

    1. And meanwhile, all of the series’ crew and any cast members that lack such a sweet deal are shorted 10 episodes worth of paychecks for this season, plus the possibility of having to find work elsewhere if CBS axes the show. All because one man has a serious lack of self-control, not to mention sanity.
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      Nice job, Charlie Sheen.
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      Chuck

  7. I’m sure TWO AND A HALF MEN (TAAHM) will go on with someone else. As one (of the infinite) commentator observed, television has a long and often successful history of replacing an actor on a show and having the show go on for a long time afterwards: M*A*S*H, CHARMED, THE DUKES OF HAZZARD, BEWITCHED, ROSEANNE, STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE, SMALLVILLE, FAMILY GUY (Lacey Chalbert was originally the voice of Meg), 8 SIMPLE RULES FOR DATING MY TEENAGE DAUGHTER, most soap operas, and DOCTOR WHO. All they need to do is introduce a character like Charlie Sheen’s (rich hedonist), have Jon Cryer and kid move in with him, and it’s the same jokes and situations.

    (And sadly, I agree with PAD that TAAHM is tremendously stupid. Beyond that it’s insulting to the male gender, dividing men into: 1) nice guys who are pathetic, insecure, broke, and whiny; 2) selfish drinkers, gamblers, and man-whørëš who have money and fame fall into their lap; and 3) the “comedy genius” of a kid who’s fat and stupid. I strongly doubt fans of the show are so committed to the structure and subtle touches Sheen brought to the show that they’d flee from any change to this oh-so-elaborate format.)

    1. I get what you are trying to say, but your list of shows doesn’t really support your theory. I seem to remember that the network had to basically beg Wopat and Schneider back to “The Dukes of Hazzard” when their carbon copy replacements weren’t able to deliver the ratings. “8 Simple Rules” struggled for another season and a half after losing John Ritter, but never really survived Ritter’s death. A better example might have been the long and twisted saga of “Valerie” / “Valerie’s Family” / “The Hogan Family”.
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      Some of your other examples feature the replacement of secondary characters (Becky on “Roseanne”, Meg on “Family Guy”, Dax on “Deep Space Nine”, and I would argue even Darrin on “Bewitched”), characters which add to an ensemble, but the show’s success or failure isn’t considered to rest on their shoulders.
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      “Doctor Who” is definitely the exception that proves the rule. The concept of regeneration was a brilliant idea, and since the change in lead and supporting actors is built into the fabric of the show, even anticipated.
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      However, I have a hard time thinking that the Sheen situation in “Two and a Half Men” is really comparable. Recasting a lead in a show developed around them is a much trickier stunt to pull off. Certainly, not impossible, but one can’t ignore the many examples of shows not thriving.

      1. I wish people would stop saying “the exception that proves the rule”. The proper phrase is “the exception that TESTS the rule”. By definition, the exception disproves the rule.

        The Pedantic Mr. Black

    2. TAAHM is a pretty good distillation of the “Game” stuff that has gotten a lot of attention lately, which divides men into Alphas (Charley), betas (losers) and betas who pretend to be alphas. Women are all pretty much the same and are all attracted to alphas, though they may keep some betas around to help them raise the kids they have with the alphas (The alphas, of course, will be long gone by then).
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      It’s a pretty awful view of humans in general, though there is some truth to it. Amusing in small doses.

      1. Bill, I don’t think it’s such an awful view.
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        The traditional view has been that men are all animals attracted to hot bodies, while women are deeper, complex beings that are able to fall in love independent of physical attraction.
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        This new view just equates men and women as genetical machines that desire to mate with whoever satisfies certain imperatives, women being attracted to self-confidence the same way men are attracted to physical beauty.
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        Of course it’s a very simplistic view, too.

    3. M*A*S*H, Charmed, Bewitched, Deep Space Nine and Smallville were ensemble shows in which only a supporting or minor character left, not the star. Who did Roseanne replace? I know John Goodman left at one point, but again, he wasn’t the star. Besides, what were the ratings like in that final year?
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      Dukes of Hazzard went for one season without Schneider and Wopat, which isn’t really a “long time”, and ratings sank. Similarly, 8 Simple Rules finished out the season in which John Ritter died and ran for an additional one after his death.
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      Regarding Family Guy, I don’t think anyone really cares about voice actors.
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      Doctor Who is one of those characters who has stood the test the time, and is not inalienably connected with any one actor, much like Sherlock Holmes, Batman, Robin Hood, Tarzan, James Bond, etc. The longevity of these properties is character-oriented rather than actor-oriented.
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      Could Sheen be replaced? Sure. But I think they’d have to replace him with a similar character, and an actor who could give the viewers what they’ve come to expect from the ensemble.

      1. “Valerie.”
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        A TV series named for its star, Valerie Harper, who left after the first season. It was renamed “Valerie’s Family” and later “The Hogan Family” after they brought in Sandy Duncan to replace her. Show continued just fine without her.
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        PAD

      2. Roseanne replaced one of the daughters. I forget which one, but it was the ’80s equivalent of the two Darrens on Bewitched. They even lampshaded it by having Roseanne say to one of the kids, “Remember, you can be replaced.”

      3. Roseanne also lampshaded it in one of the last episodes (the final one, maybe?), in which we catch up with the characters years down the road. The adult DJ is being taken to a psychiatrist by his mother, because all he can say, repeatedly, is, “They say she’s the same, but she’s not the same.” As the psych and Rosie consult, we get a montage of the two girls who played Becky.

      4. (to Luigi Novi, if this gets posted further down)
        Wow, I list several shows where characters have been replaced and the show went on, and you dismiss the changes as involving minor characters or on ensemble shows. Well…

        (And I don’t know actor names, so I’ll go with characters unless otherwise stated.)

        M*A*S*H was an ensemble show, but over its run they replaced Hawkeye’s best buddy (Trapper John), the main protagonist (Frank Burns), and the person running the place (Henry Blake).

        CHARMED lost Shannon Doherty, who was one of the three stars of the show — hardly a “supporting or minor character.”

        DEEP SPACE NINE changed Terry Farrell, though with the species it made sense.

        SMALLVILLE was, for the first few seasons, all about the friendship-antagonsism between Clark and Lex, so I’d hardly call Lex Luthor a minor character. (And when they cloned Lex this season, they didn’t bring back Michael Rosenbaum, or even someone remotely resembling him.)

        ROSEANNE had Becky played by a different actress (Sarah Chalke, since best known as Eliott Reed on SCRUBS).

        DUKES OF HAZZARD replaced the stars to show them that the show could survive without them; when it did, the original stars returned the following season for a lot less money than they’d wanted.

        “I don’t think anyone really cares about voice actors.” Yeah, that’s why so few people have an opinion on Mark Hamill’s work voicing the Joker. I’ll let other animation fans sound off on this one.

        “Doctor Who is one of those characters who has stood the test the time, and is not inalienably connected with any one actor, much like Sherlock Holmes, Batman, Robin Hood, Tarzan, James Bond, etc. The longevity of these properties is character-oriented rather than actor-oriented.” Funny, all the examples you gave were of characters who appeared in other mediums before TV (or, for Bond, film). The Doctor started as a TV character, was replaced as a TV character, and kept going just fine.

        And for another example I forgot: NYPD BLUE. David Caruso *was* the star of the show; it’s only after he left that they changed the focus to Sipowitz (sic). And how many more seasons did that last after Caruso?

      5. Peter David: “Valerie.”
        Luigi Novi: I agree that this is a far better example to have used. For that matter, Spin City, on which Sheen replaced Fox, is another. So is Doctor Who, who reincarnations, as I understand it, have become a signature trait.
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        Michael P.: Roseanne replaced one of the daughters. I forget which one..
        Luigi Novi: Oh yeah. Sarah Chalke replaced Lecy Goranson as Becky. I remember preferring Chalke because she was much prettier, and Becky wasn’t featuring that prominently in the stories anyway, as I recall. She wasn’t so distinctive that the character couldn’t survive without Goranson.
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        Jonathan: The adult DJ is being taken to a psychiatrist by his mother, because all he can say, repeatedly, is, “They say she’s the same, but she’s not the same.”
        Luigi Novi: I remember they also did a joking reference to Chalke at the end of another episode in which Anthony Geary and Genie Francis showed up in Roseanne’s loose meat diner as Luke & Laura from General Hospital, and Roseanne remarks that when Becky returned after an absence, they didn’t even recognize her. And when Lecy Goranson returned to the role after Chalke’s tenure, her first scene involved sister Darlene seeing her and saying, “Where’ve you been?”
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        James Lynch: Wow, I list several shows where characters have been replaced and the show went on, and you dismiss the changes as involving minor characters or on ensemble shows. Well…
        Luigi Novi: Point taken about MASH and Charmed, which I didn’t even elaborate on specifically. However, regarding the others:
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        DS9 was indeed an ensemble show, and Jadzia was indeed a supporting character. She was never much of a breakout character, and I don’t think anyone would’ve thought the show couldn’t go on without her. But as to whether it could go on without Sisko, Kira or Odo (or perhaps, the actors who played them, especially in the case of the first two, since they weren’t makeup-heavy), that would’ve been a different question.
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        As I mentioned above, I don’t think Dukes “survived” that well without them, as ratings plummeted.
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        Whether people have an “opinion” on voice actors is a different question from whether a character or show cannot continue without it, this latter question depends very much on the character and actor. We’re not talking about Mark Hamil or the Joker, we’re talking about Meg Griffin, who is not only the cipher in the cast, but alluded to be being such many times in the show’s dialogue. I personally think Mila Kunis’ voice works better for her whiny, shallow personality, but ultimately, I don’t think anyone would care if the voice actress changed yet again. Hëll, even if we were talking about the Joker, do you really think people would not watch Batman if Hamil left, and someone else voiced the Joker? Of course they would. It’s Batman. The property itself draws viewers in a way that transcends generations, creators, medium, actor, etc.
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        James Lynch: Funny, all the examples you gave were of characters who appeared in other mediums before TV (or, for Bond, film). The Doctor started as a TV character, was replaced as a TV character, and kept going just fine.
        Luigi Novi: Which bolsters my argument. Most of those characters appeared in print, and were not inextricably linked to actors.

      6. Favorite bit on Roseanne was over the end credits the family is watching Bewitched, asking who would credibly believe you could change out a Darren without anyone noticing.
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        Becky (Chalke) quips “I like the second Darren better.”
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        TAC

    4. I should note that Dax was replaced in the final season of DS9. Her replacement wasn’t what caused the show to end (they probably only intended it to go 7 seasons, like TNG did), but it’s not really an example of a show that went on for a long time after replacing an actor, either.

      1. Oh, I dunno about that. In last Sunday’s episode of “Robot Chicken” Mark was back doing the Joker’s voice.
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        PAD

      2. I was rather suprised he did. Then I remembered the voicing is done many months ahead of the animation. If I see him doing it another year from now, then I’ll be ecstatic. 🙂

      3. Although, it was also a skit about the Joker being beaten and executed. Perhaps it was Hamill’s Joker’s swansong.

  8. Sheen started up a Twitter account, what, a week ago? He already has 2 million followers (I blocked him, which unfortunately doesn’t also block retweets).
    .
    I mean, I enjoy a train wreck as much as the next perfectly normal human being. But this seems more like everybody jumping on in the hopes that the train has an atomic bomb hidden away somewhere.
    .
    It’s just gotten so bad so quickly, that at this point I can only say that I just want Sheen to get the inevitable over with so humanity can move on. I just hope he doesn’t drag anybody else down with him along the way.

  9. Just had a thought…how about having Ryan Stiles character get divorced from Alan’s ex-wife as well, and have him move into the house with Alan and Jake?

    1. Much as I love Ryan Stiles (incidentally ABC Family shows the American WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY? at midnight; after — of all things — THE 700 CLUB), from what I’ve seen of the show he’s another beta (to use Bill Mulligan’s term), and a show about two weak/wimpy guys wouldn’t have the same dynamic as it did with an alpha and a beta. I think they’ll just make a character who’s a virtual clone of Sheen.

      1. There was at least 1 episode where Alan showed signs of changing his whole outlook to become more like his brother, with some success. They could have him become the alpha he always wanted to be and have Ryan take the beta role (though Ryan is a far more sympathetic beta than Alan, who I want to smack at times).

  10. Recent episodes have had Alan the other brotherof the 2 1/2 developing multiple personalities. The writers may have anticpated Charlie going off the rails and written in the possibility of Alan becoming the ‘alpha’ or just carrying the show himself as 2(or more !) men.

  11. Speaking of Aquaman, please tell me you caught the Aqualad episode of Young Justice….Mom would have been proud of it.

  12. I like the show. It is what it is and that’s not Shakespeare. Without Sheen the show is done unless you put another well known train wreck in his role.

    What amazes me is the sound of NOTHING from CBS and WB when Sheen was reportedly beating his wife.

    They put the show on hold when he starts yelling like a bìŧçh about them but the ‘show must go on’ when he’s pimp slapping his wife.

    That, as they say where I’m from, is gangster.

    1. “What amazes me is the sound of NOTHING from CBS and WB when Sheen was reportedly beating his wife. They put the show on hold when he starts yelling like a bìŧçh about them but the ‘show must go on’ when he’s pimp slapping his wife. That, as they say where I’m from, is gangster.”

      Apparently (and I’m not supporting this view, just stating it), the difference is that when Sheen was allegedly (innocent until proven guilty, BTW) he was still able to work and produce more episodes. The current problems started not when Sheen was publically bad-mouthing his bosses but when he kept skipping work or being unable to pull it together for work, which meant the episodes weren’t getting made. The public attacks on his bosses followed.

      Ironically, this may come back to work in Sheen’s trial: His lawyer will argue that the network stood by Sheen during much worse behavior, so to fire him over this is hypocritical and an overreaction.

      1. Ironically, this may come back to work in Sheen’s trial:
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        And yet, Sheen’s own comments and actions will overshadow anything his bosses have done.
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        After all, when you call your boss a coward and your co-worker a traitor (among other things), you’ve run straight to the corner of the room, flooding the floor with paint behind you.

  13. With all the talk about shows replacing actors, nobody on this thread has yet mentioned Shazam! Or all the different Cat Women that Adam West had to deal with!

    What sort of comics nerds are we?

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